Umm...whatever
My life has changed dramatically over the past few weeks. Some for the better, some not so much. I've gone through a lot, but I feel more like I put myself through a lot.
Most recently, Kevin and Nick left the church. Kevin left to go start a new church in Red Oak so he's no longer going to be around as much. I'll still see him, but probably not as much. I was going to see him in a few days to get my money back, but somebody cut me a check from the church instead. So I don't rightly know when the next time I'll see him is.
Nick, the Youth Ministry Intern, left to go to Bangor, Maine to transfer schools. On his last day I spent over 8 hours with him at Taco Bell in town. It was a really great time. I'm really going to miss him, even though we never had much of a friendship like now before then.
Two other things have popped up as well. I finally figured out how to have church with myself and to teach myself from the Bible. Quite honestly, that exactly what I have to do with my life right now. Kevin's not around to teach me as much anymore, neither my dad nor I have time enough in a day to sit and have a Bible study, and beyond that I don't really trust many other Christians around me just because I have some very high specific needs that need to be met when I learn. So, I need to figure out how to teach myself more often, how to go deeper, and how to keep it regular.
Lastly, I finally met my long time friend Kaitlin from Waxahachie. I'm not real sure how she and I were able to maintain such a friendship for so long, three months, without ever seeing each other and only talking on the internet through blogging or emails, or by way of text message. But she I and have been friends ever since, and I really feel like she is a little bit where my life needs to be right at the moment. Everything was honestly a bed of roses, so to say, until last night when she shared with me her testimony and for some reason I just couldn't connect with her. Everything has been amazingly well since Day 1, but when she shared he testimony with me I just couldn't feel it. It was like the connection we had had was damaged or even severed. I'm not real sure what, I'm still confused and in prayer about it, but I will get to the bottom of this somehow.
Okay, I've spilled my guts sufficiently now. I will say that this blog seems a little pointless now because I realize that not many people read this. Actually, I think the only people who check in time to time are Kevin and maybe Jessie, and I haven't heard from her in months, and Kevin is probably too busy right now with his new life so I'm fairly confident that my words are read by me alone.
Never the less, I will still write because it's good to get some of these feelings out.
Most recently, Kevin and Nick left the church. Kevin left to go start a new church in Red Oak so he's no longer going to be around as much. I'll still see him, but probably not as much. I was going to see him in a few days to get my money back, but somebody cut me a check from the church instead. So I don't rightly know when the next time I'll see him is.
Nick, the Youth Ministry Intern, left to go to Bangor, Maine to transfer schools. On his last day I spent over 8 hours with him at Taco Bell in town. It was a really great time. I'm really going to miss him, even though we never had much of a friendship like now before then.
Two other things have popped up as well. I finally figured out how to have church with myself and to teach myself from the Bible. Quite honestly, that exactly what I have to do with my life right now. Kevin's not around to teach me as much anymore, neither my dad nor I have time enough in a day to sit and have a Bible study, and beyond that I don't really trust many other Christians around me just because I have some very high specific needs that need to be met when I learn. So, I need to figure out how to teach myself more often, how to go deeper, and how to keep it regular.
Lastly, I finally met my long time friend Kaitlin from Waxahachie. I'm not real sure how she and I were able to maintain such a friendship for so long, three months, without ever seeing each other and only talking on the internet through blogging or emails, or by way of text message. But she I and have been friends ever since, and I really feel like she is a little bit where my life needs to be right at the moment. Everything was honestly a bed of roses, so to say, until last night when she shared with me her testimony and for some reason I just couldn't connect with her. Everything has been amazingly well since Day 1, but when she shared he testimony with me I just couldn't feel it. It was like the connection we had had was damaged or even severed. I'm not real sure what, I'm still confused and in prayer about it, but I will get to the bottom of this somehow.
Okay, I've spilled my guts sufficiently now. I will say that this blog seems a little pointless now because I realize that not many people read this. Actually, I think the only people who check in time to time are Kevin and maybe Jessie, and I haven't heard from her in months, and Kevin is probably too busy right now with his new life so I'm fairly confident that my words are read by me alone.
Never the less, I will still write because it's good to get some of these feelings out.
posted by geoff payne at 7:56 AM
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